Mad Banter: To Have And To Hold

“No. I’ve earned the money”

Don: “Nice place”

Pete: “Well it’s, available to you. You know, if you ever have to spend the night in the city”

Don: “I live here Pete”


Ken: “If he wants people to stop hating him… HE SHOULD STOP DROPPING NAPALM ON CHILDREN”


Scarlet the secretary: “Harry has great ideas”


Don: “Plus, a hotdog cries out for mustard”

Stan: “No… I think a hotdog cries out for… ketchup”

Don: *Eyebrows

Stan: “Squiggly line?”

Don: *Eyebrows, brandishes joint

Stan: “Hmm. I think we should order lunch”


Don: “Honey I can tolerate this, but I can’t encourage it”

Megan: “You’re perfect”


RAY FUCKING WISE: “Joe Nameth sings?”

Some suit guy: “Don’t you want to watch it just to find out?”

RAY FUCKING WISE: “Women don’t like football”


Harry: “I don’t know where you’re going but I want you to bring back champagne”


Harry: “I don’t know what she’s said because I’m not privy to these conversations but I’d like the chance to defend myself!”

Joan: “Mr Crane I hav-”

Roger: “No please. Let him go on”

Harry: “Well it’s either me or her!”

Pete: “Joan?”

Harry: “SCARLET!”

Bert: “I think you mean, if she goes I go”


Roger: “That display yesterday of…well of initiative really caught our attention. This is a cheque for 23,500 dollars”

Harry: “Well. Thank you. That’s a lot of money”.

Bert: * pleased nod

Harry: “So. Anything else to say?”

Roger: * Smile droops

Bert: “I’m puzzled. What would you like to hear Mr Crane?”

Harry: “What about the partnership?”

Roger: “We have to get bigger before we get bigger”

Harry: “What a load of crap. Bert you know how important I am to this company, you were me!”

Bert:”I was different from you Mr Crane. In every way. *Smirk

Roger:” So you don’t want the money?”

Harry: “No. I’ve earned the money”

*Carefully hides envelope in disgusting plaid jacket



Bert: “That was the most impressive thing he’s done”

Roger :“Should we fire him before he cashes that cheque?”



Werewolf Stan: “I think I see a friend”

*Walks past Peggy and Teddy Chaogh, flipping the bird the whole way


Disclaimer – I do not in any way condone the use of the word “banter” in any situation or context.

Click here for more Mad Banter. 


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